Magick, Shadow Work & The Occult with Raya Thorne

[00:00:00] Speaker A: So, yeah, getting this thing started, would you be able to give us a little bit about who you are and what you do? Exactly. [00:00:07] Speaker B: Sure. I just want to acknowledge that I'm a little bit nervous. So I'm sure as I start talking, I'll get more comfortable. Okay. So I'm a professional psychic. I work with people all around the world. And what I specialize in is reading the subconscious mind and allowing people to see their emotional blockages so they can move forward in a really positive way. And I also teach people how to be psychic and intuitive in a really grounded way by teaching them to create separation with their mind and come into an intuitive state. [00:00:44] Speaker A: Amazing. So you are a psychic that trained psychics? [00:00:48] Speaker B: Yes, I guess so. And I also, I mean, I specialize more in working with occult practitioners or spiritual practitioners because I've been in that field for a really long time. So I'm like the psychic. Psychic. So you'd say. [00:01:05] Speaker A: And you are a self proclaimed witch, right? [00:01:10] Speaker B: Yeah, I guess I, I say which. But the more correct terminology would be a magician. As I practice ceremonial magic and I focus mainly on the system of the Golden Dawn. [00:01:25] Speaker A: I have no idea what that is. The System of the Golden Dawn? [00:01:29] Speaker B: Yeah, it's a magical system that's based in Kabbalah. I get, I get nervous talking about systems and structures because I'm a very intuitive person. Like I'm constantly tuning in how to do magic and perform ritual work. But ceremonial magic is very formulaic. So it definitely pushes my expertise with systems and structure and being practical. And I think that's why I like it as well. On the flip side, what's your, I want to ask you, what's your preferred system of spiritualism? [00:02:09] Speaker A: Yoga. Meditation. So Vinyasa Yoga and meditation and conversation. I think this is sort of ritual in a way. This is a sort of ceremony. [00:02:23] Speaker B: I have to say I love conversation. Like talking about this type of stuff is one of my favorite things to do. [00:02:31] Speaker A: But mainly meditation, I would say just finding time to literally do nothing, disconnect from the outside world and connect with the inside world. [00:02:42] Speaker B: Do you feel like you go up more into the mind or you're coming more into the body? [00:02:49] Speaker A: Definitely more mind oriented. But I've also, I mean, actually it's a nice balance. I'd say meditation is the mind and doing the yoga, the physical yoga is the body. So it's both. I'd say it's a nice blend of both. [00:03:03] Speaker B: Oh, good. Fantastic. Yeah, I like that. I think both are really important for. [00:03:11] Speaker A: Sure because that's like both facets of our being. You can't ignore either side. Right. You get too Mindy, you get too out there. It's kind of like get ungrounded, and then if you get too much into the body, be a little too grounded. You can be a little too, like, animalistic. So I think you need both of those polar opposites to. To balance oneself out and maybe an oversimplification, obviously, but I think it is that simple. In some kind of way. It's like, you know, really has to do with the chakras as well. You know, we got a system up here, and we have a system down there. And it's up to you to do the maintenance. [00:03:53] Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely. I feel like it's what I've come to in the conclusion with that, which is probably very similar to what you're coming to as well, is the separation of the mind and the body and how we are not those things, but creating the relationship with it. So you're doing it with meditation and yoga, which I think is great. I feel like a lot of people become very identified with those parts, and then they're acting from those parts unconsciously. [00:04:24] Speaker A: So you're saying. Can you rephrase that again? Because I think I know what you're saying. But can you go more into that? [00:04:34] Speaker B: Yes. So what I feel, what I've. Okay. What I've learned, and the system I use to teach people to be psychic is first creating separation from the mind, but also the body as well. I find when they start to do this. This. They realize that they are not the mind or the body, and they can establish a relationship with both of these things. And what they also start to uncover is that there's no trust with the mind or the body. So it's a. It's a relationship that needs to be built over time. And once my students are able to establish these relationships with the mind and the body, and it takes a. It takes a while, and it's really confronting. They're able to then be able to come into more of an intuitive state effectively, rather than doubting what they're doing from a psychic or magic perspective. If they're doing ritual work or magic work. [00:05:41] Speaker A: I like that. So once we sort of disconnect from the idea or identification of the mind and body, we can actually work with it better. [00:05:53] Speaker B: Yes, because we're very identified with our thoughts and who we think we are. But these are all patterns and systems that have been created by the mind for protection, and in the end, they sabotage our growth, whether it Be spiritual or practical, whatever it is, unless you can identify it, see the pattern, and then care for whatever need hasn't been met. The mind is ultimately the one that's making the decision, not you. And you're not even aware of it. [00:06:26] Speaker A: Yeah. That's the difference between being awake or not awake. Right. Who's in control or what's in control. [00:06:35] Speaker B: Yeah. I find that phrase really interesting when people say I'm awake. I think with all the intensity of the emotional work that I've done and continue to do and do with a lot of my students and clients, it's interesting how quickly we feel like we are aware or conscious. And even now, as someone who's working professionally full time, reading for hours a day, I'm still uncovering layers of unconsciousness. I just don't know where it ends. [00:07:16] Speaker A: I don't know if it ever does. [00:07:18] Speaker B: I don't think it does. Yeah. I just think it gets more and more horrific. [00:07:24] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, I would say there is a destination. Maybe it does end. We reach this enlightenment state, as they say. But it's a long journey. It's not overnight, that's for sure. Yeah, it takes time. It's not. It's not just like all of a sudden you get some kind of realization, some kind of glimpse into your consciousness out of the unconsciousness and that's it. No, it takes a lot of time. Some may say it takes lifetimes. [00:07:55] Speaker B: Yeah. I think all that's what I really love about magic and occult sciences. One of the main goals of a magician is to complete the great work. So what they call it, the great work within this lifetime. So that you have a choice whether or not you want to continue being reincarnated into Samsara, as we call it. [00:08:18] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:08:19] Speaker B: So I find that really fascinating that there is a process that is available for us to have more choice rather than be unconscious and feel we have choice, but not really. [00:08:31] Speaker A: Now, what is this process? Could you get into what magic is, first of all? I mean, I imagine people listening, know what it is. But let's say for somebody that has no idea what magic with a K is all about, would you be able to explain that for us? [00:08:50] Speaker B: I feel like magic, the definition of magic, means very different things to very different people. What magic means to me is it's the art of manifestation. Using ritual as a process to distract the mind and using intention as a way to wield your will to create the reality that you want. What we learn as magicians is to become a. The goal is to become a Completely sovereign being. So we are influencing our environment rather than the environment influencing us. And for people to truly come into magic effectively, we really have to see ourselves, because until we see ourselves, we're not in reality. But once we're seeing ourselves more clearly, we're manifesting from what is true, not what is fantasy. So the more you come into magic, the more it amplifies your dysfunction and your unconscious mind and it puts it right in front of you so you can see it more clearly and you have a choice as to whether or not you choose to take ownership of that and how it's influencing and impacting your life. Or a lot of magicians go insane because they refuse to look at how they're creating their reality and they're trying to manipulate it from a place of fantasy. So magic is very real and it's dangerous and it's something that should be taken very seriously because it can fuck up your life. [00:10:44] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:10:46] Speaker B: But if you go very slowly and you don't try and bypass the process and you take responsibility for yourself and your emotions, it can be magical. But it's not easy. It's not an easy path. It's confronting. [00:11:03] Speaker A: Now, would you say we're all conducting magic on a day to day basis, it's just whether we are aware of it or not? [00:11:10] Speaker B: Absolutely. I feel like the system of magic is obvious in many other forms of personal development, other types of emotional work, just general manifestation. What I've noticed is the system is the same throughout many different types of spiritual beliefs or, or religions. It's just slowing down and getting really curious about that process. I really like magic because it's all about taking ownership of yourself and you're in control. Like it's, it's calling upon you to be a sovereign being, to come into your true will, whatever your true purpose is. Whereas I find a lot of religions are the opposite of that. They're not about the individual individuality of the will. They're more about, you know, God is up there and you must obey and it's taking away your freedom to explore. So magic offers many different pathways for the practitioner to get curious about, to truly discover who they are and what they're capable of. Does that answer the question? [00:12:28] Speaker A: Yeah. I don't even remember what the question was, to be honest. [00:12:31] Speaker B: I kind of went on a bit of a rant. But yeah. So the components of magic are the ritual work. So rituals a way to distract the mind, to get the mind out of the way, and then the will, the intent. Like you set an Intention with ritual work, and that's directing your energy towards something. So it just gives a structure as to how to work with the mind and the intent to create the outcome that you want. But this is obvious in a lot of other systems that are available as well. [00:13:10] Speaker A: Yeah, for sure. Like the Eastern philosophies. [00:13:13] Speaker B: Oh, absolutely. Yeah. [00:13:15] Speaker A: Yeah. I think the biggest thing is intentionality, really being firm with one's intention. That is the work and that is the power that we take back. Is being able to hone in on what you're doing and why you're doing it. [00:13:35] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:13:36] Speaker A: Is that the mark of a magician, would you say? [00:13:38] Speaker B: I think this is the mark of being a human. And what I've discovered of. So what I'm doing is I'm in people's minds all day long, reading their minds and their psychological process. [00:13:51] Speaker A: Are you reading my mind right now? [00:13:53] Speaker B: No. I have, like. I have ethics. Like, I'll only read your mind if you pay for a session. And you're like, raya, can you tell me why I do this thing? [00:14:00] Speaker A: I see. Yeah, yeah. [00:14:04] Speaker B: No, it's good. It's an obvious thing that people say to me. Are you reading my mind right now? Can you not read all my private thoughts? No, I'm not. Can I do that? But that what you've brought up is a really interesting point and it's something that we say a lot in just as a human. Like, why are we really doing things? And I know why I'm really doing things. But what I've discovered is for the thousands of people I've read, we don't really know why we're doing things. Like, the subconscious mind is incredible and it's able to convince you of things and make things sound practical and logical, but it's not actually the real reason why you're doing something 99% of the time. And even my self exploration into this, because I've had to look at myself to be able to see other people deeply as well. And the reasons for the decisions I've made in my life have been confronting and shocking. And I'm like, holy. I didn't even realize I was making that decision because of something else that happened to me a long time ago. And I'm still making decisions based on that experience. So it's an interesting topic. [00:15:17] Speaker A: Yeah. So is that the work is that the mastery is being able to unveil all of our unconscious. Yeah. Our unconsciousness to be able to truly reach and hone in reach this point of ultimate intentionality with our actions. So that thus we get out of the loop of Samsara. [00:15:47] Speaker B: Yes. I feel like the mastery of being a magician is to have freedom. Like that's with a lot of the occultists and magicians that I've worked with. The common theme is that people come to magic because they're coming from a place of disempowerment, not feeling powerful. And that's exactly why I came into magic. Like I started practicing at a very young age because I felt so disempowered in my life. But it's taking ownership of that disempowerment. See, the problem is a magician sometimes doesn't realize they're coming from that place and will do magic from disempowerment without taking ownership of it. And it actually creates more disempowerment. Whatever you were avoid or run away from will manifest and keep you will create it. Whatever you're afraid of, that's what you will manifest and create. So magic is the mastery of the self and someone like yourself who's interested in authenticity. It's about taking ownership of all the parts of you that you are hiding, that you've suppressed, repressed, don't even realize that there can't see your mind convinces you is not true. And when you're talking, talking about authenticity, the problem with the spiritual community is they always go into this like toxic positivity. But it's actually looking at the part of yourself that's manipulative, that's cold, that creates disconnection, that is co creating every situation that you've been in, even when it is abusive and not fun, there's a reason that you were in that situation as well. Because everything is a co created situation. So it's taking ownership of all that really uncomfortable stuff. And not only that, like the stuff that you learned from your parents that you've embodied, that you don't even realize or you're trying to run away from or pretend that you're not, because we've internalized those parts as well. So it's really looking at things that are very uncomfortable. Sitting in shame, sitting in your shame and then going underneath the shame. Because shame's a really good blocker. People can't get past the shame, so they never see what's really underneath. They never get free from the shame. So they're making decisions from shame, which is once again that, that state of powerlessness. So magicians, if they're really good at it, this is why they usually come to me. They'll be like, Raya, tell me what I'M Tell me what I can't see so that I can move forward and become more sovereign in my being, so that my magic works, so that I can reach this state of consciousness, so that I can connect with my holy guardian angel, which is a very famous ritual if you're a magician. Yeah. So it's taking ownership of all the parts of you, and you are everything. So you need to really dig deep and go, ah, okay, I'm. That, that, that, that. How can I bring that forward into the consciousness, take ownership of it, care for it, but also make a decision from a very grounded place, not a shadowy place. [00:18:57] Speaker A: Yeah. So it's like ultimate accountability with our actions, our thoughts and actions. [00:19:03] Speaker B: Yes. And this is. This where I'm currently at with this is I'm starting to see how intense my thoughts manifest. So if I'm ruminating on something that's shadowy and bullshit, that's where my attention is going to. Towards and it's actually creating that thing. So magic really amplifies the obviousness of how our thoughts create our reality. And I know that's such a cliche thing to say, but do you really know how much you're thinking and where the thoughts are coming from and what they're connected to and who they actually belong to? Like, that's the stuff that I'm working in at the moment. All right, how do you feel about that? What comes up for you? [00:19:58] Speaker A: What comes up for me is Buddhism, because I see Buddhism as the ultimate framework for accountability to get out of Samsara. I mean, that's quite literally what Buddha was teaching us. So I'm trying to, like, bridge the gap between how you're explaining it and also the way that I understand in Eastern philosophy. And there's a lot of similarity, that's for sure. And I think it comes down to, as I said, accountability. Maybe the practices are different, you know, the rituals are different. I mean, there's not really rituals in Buddhism, but the modalities we could say, are probably a little different, but the same essence. Like, it's really just about dissecting who you are, you know, getting to know that, getting to know yourself, getting to know the mind, how the mind works. And in that revealing, you see that you've been doing this to yourself the whole time. You know, like you've. You're the one that got yourself into this message, and that's the bad news. But the good news is you can get yourself out of it again. That's what the Buddha taught us. So is that correct in Terms of like, how. How you would say magic or a magician sees it is like, you know, I did this to myself maybe lifetimes ago, many, many lifetimes ago, if you believe in that. But I can get myself out of it in this lifetime, as you said. [00:21:29] Speaker B: That's such a good question. A few things come up for me with that question. It's probably because I get activated by the spiritual community a lot, just take ownership of that. What I'm finding with people talking, speaking into past lives and stuff like that, I find that going into those places is fun and interesting and curious. However, I feel that stuff that's happened in a past life stays there. It's not impacting this one. This is my belief anyway. I mean, I'm sure everyone can have their own opinion. But what I've noticed is that people who do stuff with past lives, like past life regression, it doesn't actually heal anything in this life. In fact, it creates this system of bypassing, like trying to skip over the shame or the anger or the hurt or the pain that you've experienced in this life by focusing on another life and going, it was that. It's there. It's that thing. So I'm always about the philosophy of what's currently happening now in this present timeline where you are currently right now. So I always try and bring my. My philosophy and a magician's philosophy. I mean, I'm sure some magicians are going to disagree with me. And that's totally cool because there's so many different belief systems within magic. It's always about focusing on becoming present and being so present that you're very aware of how you're impacting and influencing the present moment. So I feel like it's taking ownership of what's happening in the present moment. And if you're activated or there's an emotional blockage that's coming up, looking at it from this lifetime, what's happening in this life that created that system and that belief, because I feel it's the brain, the biological brain, and the brain has been programmed from things that have happened in this life, not the past life. Your soul, yes, May be carrying so many different timelines and stories and stuff, but right now what you're working with is the biological brain. And this body exists in the now. So being present with it and working with the mind is where I would begin. And with Buddhism and magic, there are a lot of crossover like it. It is asking you to be present, come into a meditative state. I would challenge you and say that Buddhism Actually does have ritual because there's a lot of prayer, there's a lot of meditation. Like, there's things that you do in a ritualistic way to help you distract the mind and. Distract the mind and come more into your spirit or essence. Buddhism asks really fantastic questions to, you know, allow you to go deeper. So there are a lot of similarities in that. What I look for in any type of system or with what the person is doing is what are they avoiding to not be in the present? Because if they're avoiding something, it's pulling them either into the past or into the future, and they can't be present with what's actually happening. So that's what I feel I'm focused on as a magician and as a psychic that helps people move through emotional blockages. [00:24:57] Speaker A: Yeah, that's powerful. And from that vantage point, it's like past lives doesn't really matter. You know, if you lived a million lifetimes, it doesn't really. I mean, you're here now. That's really all that matters. [00:25:10] Speaker B: Yeah. And. And I feel like it's feeding a fantasy. It's like, oh, my God, I feel unfulfilled in this life, but in my past life, I was Cleopatra or whatever. I mean, come on, be here. [00:25:24] Speaker A: I know what you mean. See, I can recognize both. I can recognize that the only. Because I'd still. I still believe in karma. There's just something in me, like an intuitive intelligence that leads me to believe that there were. There had to be past lives. Like, you ever meet somebody and you're like, you jive with them a little too well. You're like, is this. Do we know each other? Or just, like, things that. Things that just happen. Like, you know, some people are just born a certain way. They're born with gifts. They're born with a certain kind of energy. I think there's something that we carry with us, and that's cool to entertain, for sure. Like you said, that's cool to recognize. But at the same time, you're right. It doesn't matter. It doesn't really matter. All that matters is your present in this life. But I think it's, like, also good to recognize, to give context for one's strengths and weaknesses, we could say, or why one is in a certain predicament from birth. You know, why you. Why things seemingly happened to you. Well, they didn't really happen to you. You did it in a past life. You sowed that seed in a past life. That's how I justify it. At least, you know, it's like some just happens in our life. It's like, what? Why? You know, how many of us feel like life's against us? And, you know, it's like, I didn't deserve this. What did I do to deserve this? Well, you know, that was like 70 lifetimes ago. And you did. You did X, Y, and Z to deserve this. That's how, like, I justify the sort of. The injustices of our life, you know, things that aren't necessarily fair. It's like, oh, it's all karma. It all has a place in karma, right? Like, it all, like, has order in the idea of karma. So that's the only. That's the only reason that I believe in past lives. Because, like, the injustices and inequality of the world make sense in that context, you know, and maybe that's just me. Hey, I don't know. Maybe that's just my mind creating up stories. But to me, that's the most believable story at this moment. But it doesn't matter. As we said, too. That's the thing I could recognize both is that, you know, it has this. The mind provides the context. Maybe it's because I just like to have some kind of foundation for context of why the world is suffering. I think it's. I justify it through karma so I can recognize that part of some sort of justification, some kind of, like, rational justification that transcends lifetimes. But also at the same time, I recognize it's kind of fruitless to dwell on that too much. Right. The practice is like a simultaneousness of recognizing karma in past lifetimes. But if you get caught on that too much, then that, ironically so can cause suffering. So I see your point as well. It's like, just throw that idea away. You're just creating stories. Might be a good story. It might be a story that is interesting. But at the end of the day, it's not going to serve you. And if you get caught on that too much, ironically, so you will just create more karma, I think, to keep reincarnating and stay stuck in some sorrow. [00:28:35] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:28:35] Speaker A: Am I making sense here? [00:28:36] Speaker B: Yeah, totally. It's interesting. Karma is an interesting topic, and it's. It's interesting how you're talking about karma from the perspective of the justification of why the world is or why things happen to people or it, you know, really unfair things. And I've sat with this for quite a bit, especially during COVID I think it really amplified the dysfunction of what was happening with our civilization. And I found. What I found was my mind Was using what was happening on the outside as a distraction because I didn't want to actually acknowledge how I was feeling in here. So it was very easy to get caught up in what was happening with everyone else and the world being fucked up and everything being so unfair and the justification of karma and oh my God. But what I found is when I did that, it distracted me from actually reflecting and coming in and going, oh, what do I actually feel? And what I was actually feeling was powerlessness coming back full circle, that feeling of feeling powerless, which is. Which terrifies me because when I feel I'm powerless, I'm not safe and I could die and all that stuff plays out. So my mind will create the distraction of the things in the outside world. And what I've learned about karma, because I'm looking at everything from the perspective of being here now and being in this reality as much as possible. So my mind will use whatever it wants on the outside world to distract me and create rumination because it was not safe for me to have an emotional process when I was younger. So the mind is constantly in a safety mechanism. And I notice this with people when like the government's doing something or the price of living and all of those things are happening. But it's a massive distraction for the mind and it stops people from acknowledging what's actually happening inside. And regarding karma, the most fucked up thing I've learned about karma is that the more you can see yourself and see why you make the decisions you do, you make the decisions you have made in the past, the more you actually see the karmic process because you see that you didn't have choice, that you're making decisions from an unconscious space which then caused a chain reaction of events because you are unaware of why you were making the decisions in the first place and all those decisions. And I'm speaking from my own experience because my life has been very colorful. When I was making those very unconscious decisions from a state of powerlessness or wanting to be loved, accepted, all like, all of those types of things, the consequences were massive. And the more I aware, and I don't like that word, but the more aware I become of this, the more I see the karmic chain reaction that I co created. And the karma goes back to like my mother being pregnant and feeling all her feelings and in like what was passed down from her. And this is what I kind of find really interesting about past lives. I actually feel like past lives were the lives of our ancestors and what they couldn't deal with was then passed down to me. So what I've actually had to take ownership of was all the shit that my parents didn't take ownership of and couldn't process because they weren't in the space to acknowledge their own trauma and their own emotional experience. So then I learned that, and my karma is now taking responsibility for that, Even though it's unfair and it feels terrible and it's very challenging and it makes my life a certain way. So that's what I've learned about karma. And of course I feel like with the soul, there's the past lives and obviously there's that coming down too. But I always try to bring it back to this life because that's where we actually do have power. Because I can't go back and change my past life, I can't go into the future and change that because that hasn't even happened. All I really have control over is what's happening right now. So what is the karma that. From the decisions I've made previously that I need to acknowledge, and for me, it was self abandoning was the biggest thing I did. I constantly disregarded my own needs for connection and then the consequences of that have been horrific. So really taking ownership of that karma now and not self abandoning has allowed me to manifest where I am now. So that's how I feel about the karmic reaction and why it's important to take responsibility from it. But the more aware you have, the more you're going to see your karma. And it's very confronting. [00:33:29] Speaker A: Powerful stuff. Yeah, it just makes more sense actually, when you put it that way. It's like, I mean, yeah, there might be soul karma. I don't know. I mean, like, I really don't know how it works, to be honest with you. I just, like, I feel like there is. It is a thing, right? Like, I feel like there is truth in that idea in some way, in the way that you just described and never heard it put in terms of there being ancestral karma, like almost literally genetic. Genetic epigenetic karma. [00:34:01] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:34:02] Speaker A: I mean, that just makes the most pragmatic sense, doesn't it? [00:34:06] Speaker B: Yeah, we learn things from a DNA perspective. And the way that I've come to this conclusion is just from reading so many people's minds. Because everything I'm connecting back to is always the relationships that they've had with people. And the first relationship that we all have is with the mother and the father. So that is immediately programming how our mind sees the world and what's safe and what's Not. And then the continuum of as that relationship develops, how our mind structures itself. So this is why we have people in trauma bonds because of the relationship they had as a child that's very familiar with the person, that they're in a relationship now. And a lot of people don't see what true connection really is. And what you have to work through to actually have that is very confronting because you have to look at why you're in a relationship where the decision came from, what is being amplified, what's the dynamic that's playing out, what's the unhealed trauma that's coming through in that dynamic that needs to be acknowledged for both parties to feel safe? So there's a lot in it, that's for sure. [00:35:18] Speaker A: Yeah. So when you say you read people's minds, what does that mean? You're reading their thoughts, you're reading their emotions. What's coming through for you when you sit down with somebody and they want a reading? [00:35:32] Speaker B: Oh, such a good question. So my process is I'm using my body as my main source of intuition and then psychic impressions as a second source. So the first thing I do is I'm tuning into the person and using my body as to pick up on their body. So I'm feeling sensations and emotions through the body, which become information. What I've learned is the more I process emotion and my own stuff, the more it becomes information for me to understand and read what's happening with the other person. And then the second part is energetically connecting to their mind. And I call it like just walking with their mind. [00:36:21] Speaker A: So. [00:36:21] Speaker B: So I have this vision that I do where I'm walking down a road, and as I tune into someone psychically, a part of their mind will come forward and start talking to me. And what I've learned is our minds are very fractured and split, and there's multiple parts of our mind that are at play, including the subconscious. So I'm talking to the most predominant parts of the mind and getting curious about why they're there. What. What the psychological process of that person is, how they protect the person, how they sabotage that person, and then what it's connected to. So the person may come in and say, ray, can you tell me why I can't pursue my purpose? Like, I want to do this thing, but I'm stuck in my corporate job and I can't be a spiritual teacher or whatever it is. So I'll tune into their mind and I'll talk to the different parts of the mind and I'll Establish what the reality is, what they're not seeing, what it's connected to, and why it's sabotaging them. And then I ground it and say, hey, here's all the practical steps you need to do to work through these emotional blockages. Sometimes I'll get guides come in too. Like when I'm reading something and I'm like, oh, I don't know how to interpret this. I'll just say, hey, dude, can you just tell me what this means? What am I telling them? What do they need to know? So that's kind of the process that I go through with people. And the readings that I give are, like, very deep. They're not surface level. I'm not going into Airy Fairy. I'm not here to validate your spirituality or blame other people. I'm here to give you a sense of clarity around what's really happening with you and how you can move through it. [00:38:05] Speaker A: Awesome. Well, yeah. So you're like, using the body as a antenna. [00:38:12] Speaker B: Yes. [00:38:13] Speaker A: You get signals, subtle signals in your body. [00:38:16] Speaker B: Yes. [00:38:21] Speaker A: Yeah, I feel that. I mean, I think we're all psychic in some way. I think we all get those messages. It's just like, how attune are you? [00:38:31] Speaker B: Like, you're psychic. You're intuitive. [00:38:34] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:38:35] Speaker B: You're reading people more than what you're revealing. Shh. [00:38:42] Speaker A: It's a secret. I'm a secret psychic. [00:38:45] Speaker B: Well, this is your. This is your living. Like, you get people on. You're reading people, you're dissecting people. You get carrying. Getting curious about the process, processing information as it comes in, seeing how it fits. [00:38:59] Speaker A: Yep. It's a skill. [00:39:06] Speaker B: Yeah, that's for sure. [00:39:09] Speaker A: Yeah. Now, what would you say is, when people come to you, what is their end goal? I know they probably all have their personal goals, but is there, like a overarching goal? [00:39:20] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:39:20] Speaker A: What are people trying to get or learn about themsel ultimately? [00:39:24] Speaker B: Oh, that's such a brilliant question. I don't think anyone's asked me that before. I feel like what I try and establish with people is the feeling state that they're wanting to create. Because we have a lot of the times we feel like if we get the material thing or if we get the job, it's going to give us the feeling that we're chasing. But I always go to them after they've asked me the question. I'm generally saying, what's the feeling that that will give you? And then I'm tuning into how they can create that feeling state and the overall feeling. People Want is freedom. They're wanting freedom. And what I've noticed with this word is the mind creates the prison as the external thing. It's the job, it's the government, it's my bills, it's my wife, it's my child, it's my husband, it's my partner, it's whatever, but it's actually the mind. So the more they acknowledge the mind and the emotions that are creating the prison, the closer they'll get to this state of freedom that they want. But they need to have a really strong understanding of what it means to be free, because they haven't even thought about that either. What, what does it mean for you to access freedom? What does that look like? What does it feel like? How is that playing out in your life? So if I was to ask you, what is the definition of freedom for you, what would it be? [00:40:53] Speaker A: Geez, I was gonna ask you. [00:40:57] Speaker B: Gotcha. [00:40:58] Speaker A: Let's see. He got me. That's a tough one. That really is a tough one. That's such a big question. But I do actually think that is what we all yearn for is freedom. So let me sit on that for a second. I'm going to think personally, or feel into it personally what it means to be free. I mean, the first word that comes to mind is presence, which I think we already spoke of before. But going a little bit more into it is not needing anything. Like when I'm free, just here, hanging out. So I think of other people that I deem as free, like saints and sages of the past. I see them like Ramana Maharshi, one example, or other people, other Indian sages that I just see as free. And I read their words. I'm like, wow, these guys are free. I see them as just hanging out with us. They don't need anything from the world. So when I think of freedom, it's like, I don't need anything. I'm just like, I'm in the experience just for the experience. I think when you're in this experience and you need something, you're trying to get something from the world or somebody else or God or just whatever. You're trying to get something that isn't already here, then you're entrapping yourself into whatever that something is. And it could just be an idea too. It doesn't have to be like, literally something. I think when you create the story of changing up the moment or trying to change up the here and now, that's the cage. You're building your own cage. So freedom to me is just not needing anything at all. How's that sound? [00:42:52] Speaker B: What drops in for me when you say that is the shadow side. And tell me what you think about this because I'm always looking at the opposite side of it, like, what's the balance? And I feel like asking for freedom in a way that is not needing anything. It feels like what you're wanting is the space of not to be judged. It feels like there's the. The fear of being judged is the opposite of that. So you're wanting to be in a space where you're no longer afraid of judgment and you've come into a space where you're fully accepting of yourself and your existence doesn't rely on the acceptance of others. [00:43:51] Speaker A: Like validation. [00:43:53] Speaker B: Yeah. What do you think? [00:43:57] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, that's freedom, right? Is not needing. Not need. Again, going back to the need. Not needing somebody else to say it's okay. Not needing anybody else to say you're good. Not needing anybody else to say you're cool. So, yeah, that aligns, that's for sure. But you're saying, like, personally, that's coming up for you. For me is. That's my idea of freedom is not needing any kind of. Or being free from the judgment of others and not needing any kind of validation from others. That's. That's freedom. [00:44:35] Speaker B: Yeah. So if. If to turn it back on me so that I can be vulnerable with you in this as well. Freedom for me would look like power. My. I have been on a pursuit for power for as long as I can remember because I'm trying to get out of the feeling of being powerless. And that's coming from childhood. So when you talk about the way you see freedom, it tells me that along the path there's that fear of judgment has been in the subconscious, all the consciousness, and you're working towards not allowing that to be the part that makes decisions so you can come into a space of pure presence. [00:45:18] Speaker A: I like that. You know, I think that. I think this whole. What I do here, this project online, is sort of working in that it's like a experimentation in vulnerability. Right. It's like really putting yourself out there because maybe what you're unveiling is something that has been deep rooted since childhood. I don't know when, who knows, but it's like. It's like extracting that out by doing what I do here with people. Like not only, you know, how do I put this? Yeah, it's like being vulnerable. It's really being vulnerable to bring that to light. And it's like the only way that I can get over that external validation, that need for external validation is by just kind of like just blasting myself out there in some way. And whatever comes along with that will almost, like, break that down. That's just what's coming up for me now. It's like, why do I really do this? At a deeper level, you know, at a shadow level, Maybe it's that. Maybe it's like I'm just, like, I'm just. It's. This is like the. The ultimate sense of vulnerability. Because it really is, like, how I think about it right now. It's like I really am vulnerable. Just coming on here to speak how I feel, like, open my heart to the world, you know, that is the sense of vulnerability. What are they going to say about me? They going to think I'm cool, right? They're going to think I'm dumb. Right. It's just like there's a lot of shadow work that's involved in doing what we do here. And the types of conversations that I have with people, too. It's not only just the simple fact of put myself on YouTube, but also, like, what we're going into, you know, into our emotions, into the deeper parts of ourselves. So that makes a lot of sense. And that's something that I never really thought of, to be honest with you. And. Yeah, I think that's it. I think that's it. So this is like an exploration of freedom. And maybe the end point will be that freedom from the validation from others. You know, just like the simple fact of doing this is the. The working toward freedom. [00:47:35] Speaker B: Yeah. Yep. And. And as you're speaking into this and you're saying, like, just putting yourself out there, I think that's a really beautiful part of the process. Like, really facing the fear of exploration and having these interviews with people and getting curious about other people while constantly exposing yourself, too. But the only thing I would add is just acknowledge the part that's afraid of being judged and bringing that part along with you. Because for myself, I really had to acknowledge the parts that's terrified of not being liked, that's terrified of being judged, that is afraid of being shamed. And I get this a lot. Even with the crazy, wacky stuff I talk about. Like, I'm a psychic that works with magical practitioners, talking about insane stuff that people think is mental. Like, I had to overcome a lot of stuff to come out as a psychic to even start with, due to how much it was shamed as I was growing up. So I've learned that I really need to acknowledge the part that is super powerless and that is really vulnerable, that's sitting with you here right now so that I can come as authentic as I am. And what I've learned from that too is as a teacher, because I teach people and I teach groups, I show up vulnerable and broken and dysfunctional, and then I speak from that space as to how I've been able to manage those incredibly challenging parts of the mind and be a very successful psychic and be able to show up and read consistently day in and day out. So I think what you're doing is really beautiful. And also just acknowledging the part that's afraid of being judged is just as important. [00:49:31] Speaker A: Work in progress. I think that was very sound. It was a very sound reading. And I just think back of, you know, just this kind of examination here. I think back to when I started doing this, to who I am now and definitely had made progress, that's for sure. I think about how I interact with people in my personal life and. [00:49:59] Speaker B: I. [00:49:59] Speaker A: Don'T know, like the interpersonal relations that I had back then compared to now and the difference in how I conduct myself, my demeanor, my just overall spirit. And it's changed so much, for sure. But I think it. Yeah, I think you're right. It did stem from that deep rooted sense of shame and validation and being accepted. So I'm just kind of examining in the moment now, like, have I made progress in that realm that I wasn't even aware of? And yeah, a hundred percent for sure. Like I said, maybe it's work in progress still going on. But compare this right here, right now to episode one. A different person, different Gary, that's for sure. It's like a lot more confident. [00:50:48] Speaker B: What do you feel is the one thing that you've learned the most about interviewing other people that you've seen in yourself? [00:50:57] Speaker A: That's a really tough one. One thing, the greatest thing that I got from doing this, I really have no idea. These are such deep questions. I feel like I'd have to sit on them and it's gonna sound so corny and cliche, but it's like really how to sit down and love somebody, love somebody that I don't know. Like, how do I sit down and love this stranger? Because that's what makes a good conversation. How to really connect and be authentic is like, I really gotta. I gotta love this person without sounding too, like, too corny, you know? [00:51:31] Speaker B: No, but I. I want to ask you a question about that. You have to love this person. What if you don't have to love them? What happens then? [00:51:41] Speaker A: Then I don't think it'll be a good conversation. So it's like, I don't have to. Obviously, no one has to love. We have the freedom not to. But I think when you do, if you can, then it creates a good connection. But the only way you can love is by realizing you have the freedom not to love. But I choose to because. Just because. [00:52:03] Speaker B: What does it mean? Oh, okay. I'm curious about this because I never thought about it like that. So what. What do you classify as love? [00:52:13] Speaker A: These are some deep ones, right? [00:52:15] Speaker B: This is my job. [00:52:18] Speaker A: I didn't know you're gonna go like this. I don't know. I'm still figuring it out, to be honest. But it's. What is love? What is love, baby? Yeah. Like, come on, man. You're gonna hit me with that? It's. [00:52:35] Speaker B: What. [00:52:36] Speaker A: I don't know. [00:52:37] Speaker B: What is the demeanor that you're. Because when you say you want to love the other. This is what I feel. Tell me what you reckon. And this is like, I'm really good at dissecting things because it's what I do. When you say I want to come on and show the person love, I think what you're doing is you're trying to create a space of safety because you want. You want to. You want the person to be vulnerable with you, and essentially it to be a good interview because you want people to see other people more deeply, because you're trying to see yourself more deeply. So you're trying to create safety. [00:53:13] Speaker A: You nailed it. Yeah, safety. I want them to be them, like the best version of themselves, for sure. So when you're around me, it's like you can. You can open up and you can be vulnerable because I'm being vulnerable. So we're going to be both. Be vulnerable together. [00:53:26] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. [00:53:26] Speaker A: I think that's love. [00:53:28] Speaker B: Yeah. I love. I. I love. I love that because I'm always inviting that with my students, especially because I found with vulnerability, vulnerability creates openness within the person. Like, the more vulnerable I am, the more I can see parts of myself, and the less I'm trying to suppress or ignore what's really happening. And then I noticed the more vulnerable I am with my clients and my students, and it's not like I'm trauma dumping on them or going into my own stuff, but just being really like, this is what I'm feeling right now. How are you feeling? What's happening for you? Yes. That is. Let's talk about it. But that vulnerability creates safeness in exploration, which allows them to see themselves more deeply. And also it shows that I'm not trying. Like, I'm not a special messiah. Messiah or guru. I'm just. I'm just like you. I just. I'm just obsessive with being psychic. So let me show you my obsession and how you can do it for yourself. [00:54:28] Speaker A: Yeah, I think that is being psychic in some way. You have to be vulnerable, right? You have to. [00:54:40] Speaker B: Yes. [00:54:42] Speaker A: That opens the gates. [00:54:44] Speaker B: Yes. Because I need to be open to read other people. So it had. I have to process all the emotions and everything that comes up in my body and my mind. I have to be acknowledging all the shit that my mind's saying to me. And my mind's mental. It's like an asylum in here. So it's like developing that relationship, creating trust with it, this constant communication with it. So I can be into it being in a psychic state and not be disrupted by my mind having an opinion or wanting to rescue someone or be afraid that they're not going to like me because I tell people, really confronting stuff day in and day out. Yeah, I forgot what I was talking about. [00:55:31] Speaker A: I don't know either. Yeah, we're. We're tapped in here. Yeah, I don't remember what I asked either. Well, it was about vulnerability and like, what. Yeah, what you have to, you know, be. To be a psychic, it's vulnerable. And that opens the gates. That opens up. That opens up yourself so that you can feel the other person and really see the other person. [00:55:51] Speaker B: Yeah. And there's consequences to that. There's a lot of consequences. It's not what people think it is. And I think this is why people don't. Not everyone does it as a job. [00:56:03] Speaker A: Oh, because you could, like, take on some other person's energy a little too much. [00:56:09] Speaker B: Yeah, I'm super sensitive to everything. Like, I'm super. Like, my body's constantly. So, like, stuff like being car sick, like, I get really motion sickness because my body's like feeling everything that's happening around it. It's not like a Hollywood movie or anything like that. It's like my body is super sensitive and I have to look after it. And I can't be reckless with my body because I need my body for my job. So intense care, nutrition, health, like all the really boring stuff and taking ownership of my emotions and my mentalness when it shows up and having a really good structure on how I care. Care for it. [00:56:47] Speaker A: Yeah, that's a good point. To riff off of, I think you need a foundation of health. You don't have to be a health freak, but you have to take care of your body somewhat to be able to get the downloads per se, right? To be able to be sensitive, to be receptive. If not, then you're just creating physical barriers, physical and energetic barriers, and it's just not going to work. As we said, the body is an antenna. It's technology. And if you're not taking care of that technology, just like any other technology, if you're not doing the maintenance, it's not going to work. So 100%, you got to be healthy. That's something that isn't talked about really enough in the spiritual community is health, right? It's physical exercise, I think, and eating good. Those two things will go a long way in terms of one's energetic, energetic sensibility. [00:57:47] Speaker B: Yes. And to add to this, and this is the thing that's actually never spoken about. So everyone's like, okay, you got to exercise, you got to be nutritious, you got to care for your, your well being and all that stuff, the usual stuff that we all say, but what no one speaks into is the psychological and the emotional toll of that. So I'll use myself as an example and I'll be vulnerable again, let's be vulnerable. For me to care for myself, to create routine around it, to acknowledge how my body feels goes against what my mind feels is safe. So I, I go as a safety mechanism, I heavily dissociate and my body will shut down and it won't be useful. So as I come into a state of caring and nurturing and meeting the needs of the body and the nutrition, my mind wants to sabotage it because it doesn't believe that that care is safe. And it also brings up any trauma around that because as soon as I start caring for myself, it shows me the feelings I suppressed when I neglected and abandoned myself. So this is why it's so difficult for people to create routine around self care and nurture. Because it's never just as easy as, oh, just go on, go to the gym every day and you know, track your macros. I can't, like my brain physically doesn't let me do it. Like I have to work very hard at this type of things, these type of things. And this is like what I do as a profession. I'm people like rare. I can't, I can't exercise what's happening? And then I'll go, oh, okay. So the reason for that is every time you Start to care for yourself. Your brain will let you do it for about two weeks, but then you start to feel the neglect that you've suppressed. So it feels shitty. The brain doesn't want you to feel feelings because it was never safe, a safe experience for you to feel stuff because it was never validated or acknowledged. So you shut down that part of your experience. So every time you try to care for yourself, that gets triggered. And this is the stuff that people are not seeing or talking about because we have so many influences and spiritual people going, just love yourself, just. And it's just bullshit because, okay, well, what's underneath that? Obviously they want to do that, but why can't they? [01:00:10] Speaker A: Yeah, that's deep. That's some deep shadow work right there. Wow. [01:00:15] Speaker B: Yes. This is what I do. [01:00:18] Speaker A: Do you think putting yourself in a ritual like that is almost like you're touching upon, entrapping yourself? Because I see it as that in a way, it could be looked at as that. It's almost like the opposite of freedom. It's like, I have to eat this way. I have to wake up and go to the gym. Right. That doesn't seem too free. So do you think that's a part that you're touching upon? Like, when you tap into this ritual, it's like, oh, you're. You're almost like entrapping yourself in a lifestyle. [01:00:50] Speaker B: So this is really interesting, what you're speaking into now. So this is the story of the mind and the distortion that the mind creates, using logic and practicality as a way to stop you from doing it. So the story around, if I do this, I'm going to be like everyone else and it's too structured and it's too rigid and I'm not going to listen to authority is something that we learned really little. So if the story is. I'm not going to do that because it's controlling me. What's actually happening is there's an unconscious part of the mind that's fearful of control, and control was never safe. What could have actually happened? If I go into the mind, I will talk to the part of the mind that's rebelling against creating structure for care and nurture. And I'll talk to it and I'll be like, hey, what's happening? Why don't you like this? And then the mind will tell me a story, it'll show me something, and it'll be like, oh. When I grew up, my parents were really strict and they never let me do anything. So now anytime I feel any type of control or structure. I rebel against it because if I fall into that, I'm actually going to feel the feelings I suppressed when I was little and my parents were being super strict. So the mind doesn't let you see the subconscious, but it creates the story and the distortion as to why. [01:02:11] Speaker A: And then it creates the narrative. [01:02:13] Speaker B: Yeah. So this is the hard part is because we don't see the distortion or the story of the mind, whenever we have an emotion in the body, the mind immediately is coming. Coming in and trying to justify that emotion. Oh, you're angry because the person that you live with didn't take out the washing. You know, something dumb. But that's actually not what it is. It's something deeper. Oh, what's really happening here? But the mind is so quick to take you into the mind and be in control because it doesn't want you to acknowledge what it's suppressed, because it suppressed it for a reason. [01:02:48] Speaker A: Wow. Okay, this is great. So that is why we don't believe our thoughts. That's why you have to reach a sort of dispassion and disbelief. [01:02:59] Speaker B: Yeah. This is why I teach intuition. Because what do you have when your thoughts are no longer relevant? Instinct. Intuition. That's the oldest form of truth that is available. [01:03:14] Speaker A: Yeah, it's like a higher intelligence, right? [01:03:17] Speaker B: Yes. Well, I'd say. I mean, we all have it. It's just that we've been conditioned not to trust it. And this is the biggest thing that I get with my students is they're like, raya, I can't tell the difference between my mind and my intuition. My mind's telling me I'm making it up. My mind's telling me that I'm an imposter. Like, the mind freaks out when it feels it's going to become irrelevant. And it will do everything to push you away from your higher self. Could be your intuition could be known as your higher self. Like, the highest state of consciousness is intuitively knowing. Right. So it's pushing itself away from that way of being because it's afraid. [01:03:56] Speaker A: Yeah. Okay. [01:04:00] Speaker B: How you feeling? [01:04:03] Speaker A: Good. I mean, you just elucidated shadow work to me. Right? I mean, it's like I've always known that, and that's what shadow work really was. But the way you just explained it, I was following you 100%. Like, oh, yeah, that's what it is. That's what it is. It's like the mind tells the story, but it's always a false story. Maybe not necessarily false. It's just like it's not the right vantage point. [01:04:26] Speaker B: Yeah, it gets really tricky because you're. There's some truth in what the mind is telling you. Like, there's still, like, the relevant. Like you've been activated. Like there's an activation there. But the activation isn't generally the thing that's in front of you. It's something that hasn't been acknowledged. Otherwise, you could. You would approach it from a different perspective. You wouldn't be in a triggered state. [01:04:53] Speaker A: You got to approach it from the conscious perspective, I think. [01:04:57] Speaker B: Yeah, you just got to get curious and slow it down. That's what I do. I'm like, okay, what's actually happening? What part of my mind is pissed off? Let me talk to that part of the mind. What's this opinion? What's this connect like? It's just like a series of questions. Oh, I'm angry because I used to get dismissed a lot when I was a kid. That's what's happening. I'm actually, like, being activated because I feel like I'm being gaslit or, you know, something like that. Like, you need to pinpoint what it's connected to. [01:05:23] Speaker A: Yeah. So would you say most of this, if not all of this comes from trauma in our childhood? Like, all the things that we got to work through, it comes from our childhood or maybe past lives, but we'll just keep it in this life for now. Would you say our childhood? [01:05:41] Speaker B: See, I'm not experienced with past lives either, so it's not my area expertise. So I'll let people who know about that talk about that, because that's what they know. I don't know, but from the way that I read the mind, I'm talking to the fractured parts. The fractured parts are created through traumatic experience senses. The trauma can be from your childhood. It can be from when you're a teenager. It can be from your adult life. Whenever the trauma happens, it creates a fracture, and then that's a Persona that I'm talking to. So a lot of this is generally the relationship that we've had with the parents and what we've inherited down the ancestral line as well. We learn how to function and have relationships with others through how our parents had relationships with each other and ourselves. And that's the programming that we've acquired. And 99% of the work I do is looking at that dynamic and how it's still playing out. And sometimes it may be the relationship you have with a teacher or you got bullied at school and the relationship with your friends. Like, it doesn't always mean it's the parents, but it's a relationship to someone else. Where the brain has. Has created a pattern to protect you from being hurt. So it's always looking at the relationships to other people. Because everything is a co creation and it's happening in creation with another. Whether it's your spirituality, your religion, your person, whatever, it's a relation. We are always having relationships with things. [01:07:19] Speaker A: See, that's the thing too. What came up for me is it's well intentioned by the mind. Right. It creates this safety mechanism. But it's. It's almost like you gotta work against that mechanism. You have to turn it against itself in some way. So it's like it's well intentioned for sure. Right. It creates this safety mechanism so you can essentially survive. Right. Or at least the idea of survival. But it's just like what was once maybe true. So the work is like undoing the story of what was once true. Or at least possibly true. Right. What was once a protective mechanism to keep you safe, even if it was just the idea of safety. It becomes obsolete, but yet we keep it with us. So the work is really just dissecting all of those safety mechanisms over the years. And that's how we become free. Right. Is like realizing actually we are safe. It's not believing the stories of the mind, not believing the endless narratives of you should do this so you can be safe. I think we do the work to ultimately see we are safe on the other side of those endless narratives. [01:08:41] Speaker B: Yes. So coming full circle, when you look at why you want to be free, it's looking at the shadow part of yourself that was once judged and how that is still playing out in different aspects of your life and learning to observe that part of the mind and bring it into the consciousness. So you're having a relationship with that part rather than it being unconscious in the background making all the decisions for. For you. So your pursuit of freedom is taking ownership of those parts of your subconscious, acknowledging them. But then you, Gary, becoming the leader. Not the part that feels judged. [01:09:22] Speaker A: Powerful. Yeah, it's like that meme. You ever seen the meme of Captain Phillips? The guy's like, I'm the captain now. [01:09:31] Speaker B: I don't know if I have, but I feel like I probably have. [01:09:33] Speaker A: Oh man. It's an older meme. Yeah, it's where the. I don't want to get too much into. I think people will know what I'm talking about or they won't. I'm the captain now. They take over the ship. [01:09:42] Speaker B: Good. Yes. You're the captain now, and I feel like that's what you're doing with this, with your work. [01:09:49] Speaker A: Becoming the captain. [01:09:50] Speaker B: You're becoming the captain. You're getting curious. There's a part of you that wants to know. Like, your curiosity is probably what saved you in your life. It's bringing you out of survival into thriving. Yeah. Because the more you thrive, the more you're going to come into freedom. You can't be in freedom when you're surviving. So there's something about you that needs to know, and there's a reason why you need to know. Why do I need to know this? Why do I want to know this? Why am I so curious about everyone else's process? What is underneath that? Where is that coming from? [01:10:25] Speaker A: Yeah. I don't know. It's a good question. Yeah. I think, as you said, it's like. I don't know. Actually, that's a really good question. I had to sit that one. Why am I so curious? Just naturally curious. I don't know. [01:10:37] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:10:37] Speaker A: What would you say? What makes. What do you think? Just, like, right now? What comes up for you? Would you be able to feel into. [01:10:42] Speaker B: That why you're curious? I feel like, oh, it's gonna get a bit vulnerable. [01:10:49] Speaker A: It's okay. [01:10:51] Speaker B: I feel like you're curious about other people's process because you had to put the needs of other people first before your own. So you can't. You're constantly reading the other person to work out who they are so that you can understand what you need to do, how you need to present yourself so a part of you can be safe and not judged. [01:11:12] Speaker A: Hmm. Okay, hold on. I feel like I gotta rewind that one. Oh, man. So I'm curious to know somebody or know about somebody else, because I put other people's needs first to uphold a sense of safety. [01:11:36] Speaker B: Yep. [01:11:38] Speaker A: So I'm still playing on that same idea of why I'm curious about other people's path, other people in general. [01:11:45] Speaker B: Well, it won't be the full reason, but it sparked the curiosity to begin with. So there would be a part of you that's had to be. And I'm not reading you. I'm just. I'm just guessing at the moment. There would have to be a part of you that had to work things out yourself, had to be more independent. You don't like authority. You don't like being told what to do. You like creating your own path and being in control. [01:12:16] Speaker A: Mm. [01:12:17] Speaker B: You're also very good at reading other People, which is your psychic awareness. This is. And you're good at asking questions and getting curious about other people because you're trying to work out and read the other person. And this would have come from reading other people to see what type of mood they're in, to navigate, how to deal with that. Because their needs were getting met and acknowledged before yours. Hence, the judgment comes in as well. Like not wanting to be judged out of fear of doing something wrong. Am I going to do something wrong? What is the consequence of that? So these are some of the systems that your brain would have developed, which is now playing out so in a. In a very different way. But it's coming from that. The reason I'm so psychic and can read people is because I had to. [01:13:17] Speaker A: That's powerful. Yeah. [01:13:20] Speaker B: So these are. These are. These are things that are old and I don't feel like. I feel like people who are super psychic had to be psychic. And that gift is always there. But now when they come into the space of I want to be a psychic, they need to come into this reality, which means facing the shit that they haven't been able to acknowledge or most of the time don't even realize is there. So it's not your entire identity, but it's come from a space of I need to know about other people for a reason. [01:13:52] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah. That makes a lot of sense. So you're saying how we develop, how our character develops is actually, like you said, for a reason. It's for survival. All of it comes down to survival. [01:14:09] Speaker B: Yes. [01:14:10] Speaker A: All of us, like, we develop for a reason. And the reason is to just simply survive in all of our different situations. It's just to get through. So I'm doing what I do, you're doing what you do. The listener does what they does. They do what they do, ultimately, because at one point in time, they develop that. That tendency. Right. That behavior pattern, to just simply survive. [01:14:36] Speaker B: Yeah, because you. If you. That's exactly right. If you look at it from a primal perspective, at the core of our being, when we're a child or a baby, we're at our most vulnerable. So our brain is trying to work out what is the best way to survive in this situation, to bond with the caregiver, the parent. So if you grew up in an environment that's very unsafe, your mind may suppress your emotional experience, fear or terror, so that you can survive that situation. And this is where blind spots come in. In our adult awareness, sometimes we won't even realize that things are happening to us because it's something that we've had to suppress when we were younger. And this is why shadow work and going inwards is so important. Because half the time we can't even see what we've suppressed. We don't even realize it's there. So even just saying to you, look at the fear around doing something wrong and how much that plays out in your life would open doors. Because if you every time you want something, look at the opposite of it. Say, for me, I want to be powerful. That's a part of me, Right. That's my teenager. She's like, yeah, let's like be super powerful. Let's be an occultist and a witch and burn houses down. Like, that's a very real part of me that I've developed a relationship with. But why is she there? Why is that part feeling the need to be like that? What's the opposite of that? That she's trying to not feel the powerlessness. Coming back to that again. [01:16:16] Speaker A: Yeah. This is some deep work, Raya. Yeah, this is. I feel it. I'm seeing it. Yeah. Now would you say it has to do with that is like seeing the opposite, right? Like, keep going to the opposite. [01:16:32] Speaker B: Yeah. Yes. So the way the mind works is there's the primary and the secondary. So the primary part of the mind is your Persona, the one that you identify with the most. And this is an example of it. I'm a good person. I never do anything wrong. I always care about other people. Right. That's the primary part of your mind. The secondary part is the part in the back that's actually manipulating people to make sure they're okay so you feel safe or like all the parts that we. The secondary part is the part we don't want to acknowledge. The part that's horrible, that's mean, that's self centered, that doesn't have empathy. All that is in the background. And until we acknowledge the secondary part of ourselves, we can't really, truly be in reality. We're not manifesting from reality. We're manifesting from the primary part of ourselves. That's in fantasy. [01:17:29] Speaker A: Yeah. It's like really look at the motive, right? [01:17:32] Speaker B: Yes. [01:17:34] Speaker A: So. [01:17:34] Speaker B: And it's okay that it's there. Right. So one of my motives is I've always wanted to be a celebrity because of my fear of not being liked. Which is hilarious because the bigger you get, the more people don't like you. It's funny. [01:17:47] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:17:47] Speaker B: But it's like I had this fantasy about, oh, if I'm a celebrity, people will Love me and then everything will be okay. Right. So it's acknowledging that I have that part that wants to be liked. So that part isn't the part that's making all the predominant decisions, but it's like, what is the need that's not met there? Oh, okay. It's acknowledging the part of me that wasn't nurtured, that needs nurture, and now I have to take responsibility for that. So that I'm not wanting to be a celebrity for a shadow reason, because then that's inauthentic. But it's also acknowledging the part of me that likes attention. Yes, I like attention. Okay, good. [01:18:28] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:18:29] Speaker B: I'm not. It's not coming from the background. I'm not pretending that that's not real or a part of it. [01:18:34] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. So it's okay to have motive, but you got to recognize the motive. And then that's how we transmutate the energy. That's the magical alchemization process. [01:18:47] Speaker B: Yes. So there's something that I say to magicians where I'm like, they do this ritual called the Abramelon. If you're an occultist watching, they'll know what it is. But this ritual called the Abramelon is about connecting and creating conversation with the Holy Guardian Angel. The Holy Guardian angel could be like your guide or your higher self. There's all these different things of what this is, let's just say, to have connection and communication with your higher self, which is your most intuitive part. So what I say to magicians, a lot of the time as they're doing this ritual, and it's a six month ritual, so it's like one of the most intense rituals you'll ever do. As they're doing this ritual and going through the process, what I'm allowing them to see is the shadow parts of themselves. Why are you doing this? Why are you acting like that? Why are you making that decision? Why is your brain trying to sabotage it? And we start to uncover all of these different parts of themselves that they didn't realize were there. Because what I always say is you come to your higher self as your whole self. You never come to your higher self as the pretty part that's part polished that you think is the most acceptable, the most perfect. No, it's the part that's disgruntled. It's the part that's broken. It's the part that's sad, depressed, that doesn't function, that shuts down, that's ugly, that's angry, that's Sad. That is wonderful. That is intelligent. It's like, come to this state. Come to that part. What am I trying to say? Come to the end of the ritual as your entire self. Don't pretend that you are not those things. Things. Because it's asking you to come as an authentic human, and this is exactly what you're trying to get to. I want to see the most authentic versions and parts of people. Well, it's never the most shiny part because that's the part people want you to see, but that's not the part that's real. [01:20:36] Speaker A: Yeah. And I can just sense it, too. I think we all can. We can all sense when there is inauthenticity, when somebody's a little too put together. It's like, what's up with that? You know what's up with this person? Come on. Yeah, it's like, let loose a little bit, man. Come on. [01:20:53] Speaker B: Well, you know what they say. The more perfect someone presents, the more up they are in the background. And that's definitely. That's absolutely true. And I also take ownership of that because I was someone that was always like, I need to look perfect. I need everything to be per. Like that. And I'm like, oh, okay. I'm trying to control the narrative and be something that I'm not whilst not acknowledging the part of me that isn't that. [01:21:20] Speaker A: I mean, think about it. We all. We like the bad guys. We like the villains. Why do we like the villains? Is it necessarily what they do like this, the heinous acts they do? Maybe not, but I think we like them because they're authentic. [01:21:34] Speaker B: We like them because that's who we are. [01:21:37] Speaker A: What do you mean? We're the bad guys? [01:21:39] Speaker B: Yes, we are the villains. We're not acknowledging what I've. [01:21:45] Speaker A: This is a deep one, too. [01:21:46] Speaker B: Yeah. Is the more people don't take. Don't take responsibility for how they show up. They create the very thing that they fear. So if you're afraid of being alone, but you don't take ownership of why you're alone and the part of you that feels loneliness, you will consistently create that loneliness. If you say, I never manipulate anyone, I'd never do that. You're not acknowledging the part of you that would or does or has. So we are the villain. A lot of the times we do lack empathy. We do think of ourselves. We make selfish decisions. We put ourselves first. We don't think about the consequences of our actions. Especially. Especially when we're in an addiction or addiction. Addictive tendencies. And we all Have a part of us that is addicted to something and that overrides decision making. When we're in that addiction, whether it's being addicted to social media or addiction to love, or being in a relationship, or the addiction to sex, drugs, alcohol, or the addiction to avoidance, we all have these addictive tendencies. So we need. We need to come into a space where we're acknowledging, I am the addict, I am the villain, I am the manipulator. I am like all of the things, and you are all things. This is coming into deep spiritualism as well. When they say you are God, right? And it's like, oh, we're all God, we're all connected. No, that's not actually what it means. It's like, you're God, so you are all things, so you are the asshole. You need to take ownership of that. You need to look at where you're being an asshole and how you're co creating the situation. [01:23:24] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's easy just to say, I'm God, I'm the love and the light, but God is more than that. Yeah, I know what you're saying. [01:23:37] Speaker B: Yeah. And I'm feeling like God is just a representation of consciousness, but not as in a, like love and light, as in the more aware you become, the more you see, see how much you are influencing and controlling your reality and contributing to it. And I think that's what God is. It's like becoming aware of what you're doing. [01:23:59] Speaker A: Yeah, it's the creator, really. It's another word I like to use is creator. So once you start to feel that you are God or a part of God, you feel that you are the creator and you're creating this whole thing. I mean, we talked about that plenty in this conversation. [01:24:13] Speaker B: But yeah, you're creating this right now. This is. I'm sitting in your universe. This is your universe I'm sitting in. [01:24:20] Speaker A: Oh, it's mutual. We're sitting each other's universe. Honestly, I feel like I'm sitting in your universe. You're on my show, but I'm in your universe. And you know what's even trippier too, is the person in the future is. Are we in their universe? Maybe we're in their universe. [01:24:39] Speaker B: Yeah. Isn't that what timeline? This is something that I was thinking about the other day. When I was little, I used to always do these intentions and I was like, I want to be a time traveler. Like, I was obsessed with time travel for some reason. And I was like, I want to be a time traveler. That's what, like, I did all these, like, magical rituals to be a time traveler. And then I became a professional psychic. And I, I think that this is how I'm traveling through time because I'm in people's minds, reading their past and then also future. I'm like, all right, this is what's going to happen in the future if you don't. So I feel, in a sense, we always get what we ask for. It's just never in the way that we intend it. [01:25:20] Speaker A: Yeah. It's not like you built the time machine, you stepped in back to the Roman times. No, you're doing this in the. This is the only way that maybe time travel could work, or at least work from your vantage point is by doing what you do. [01:25:32] Speaker B: Well, for me, yeah, this is time travel for me, because I'm traveling through people. [01:25:37] Speaker A: You know, it's funny, I feel the same way too, because I've always been obsessed with time travel in some way. And I feel as though literally video and recording audio is time travel. [01:25:50] Speaker B: Yes. [01:25:50] Speaker A: We're actually recording time right now. [01:25:53] Speaker B: Yes. Oh, I got goosebumps when you say that. [01:25:57] Speaker A: Right? It's true. [01:25:58] Speaker B: Yep. This is something that I've been fascinated in as well. Like in the fourth dimension, where they talk about the, the fourth component, like the fourth dimension dimension is adding time to the 3D. And I always find that fascinating. And I'm not a scientist, so practical, logical things I struggle with, but I really love that the concept of, oh, you add time into it and that creates the other dimension. So I'm always wondering about how that that plays out. But we do really have a sense of time in this reality as well. So I have no idea what I'm talking about. I'm just really fascinated by. [01:26:31] Speaker A: But I was kind of following you there. Yeah, that's definitely a trippy one. So, yeah, it's like you're. It's like time travel is. This is such an out there conversation. Time travel is created. It's like you, you got to create your own time travel. You got to create your own wormhole. [01:26:51] Speaker B: Well, I think so. And I also feel like with what I do, all information is available because when I'm tuning into someone's mind, I'm talking to a part of their mind, and then they're showing me this situation that happened to them in the past. And I think this is how mediums work as well. Even though, like, I can still talk to dead people, but it's not my specialty because dead people are just dead people. They don't give me much information. I'd rather talk to a guide. They know more than dead people. But anyways, beside the point. I feel the reason that psychics are able to access this information is because everything's happening all at once. Because they're accessing people that have died and they're having real conversations with them with information that's confirmed, that's evidential. But then if you look at reincarnation, shouldn't their soul have already moved on to another life? So what I feel is happening is that's a form of time travel as well. We're all, everything's happening all at once. As a psychic, I am just tuning into that moment in time that's available to me now by asking the right questions. And you can do this at any point. And it's using energy and frequency to do it. Because majority of my clients are overseas and online. I still do in person, but I'm reading people across the world and it's accurate. And they're like, well, how are you doing that? Just connecting into your energy. So I feel this is where everything is information and that information is energetic and this leads back into emotions. So the more I understand and process my own emotions when I'm reading other people, that emotional experience just becomes information that then tells me about them, which then I'm allowed to decipher to give them the way forward. I'm telling them essentially how they feel and why they feel. And it's because that information, that energetic frequency or currency, however you want to put it, is available. And I think this is what time travel is. [01:28:44] Speaker A: I'm going to have to clip that one. This is what time travel is. [01:28:50] Speaker B: This is what time travel is. This is what I think it is anyway, because this is how I've been able to do it. [01:28:57] Speaker A: Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. I mean, that's like the idea of the akashic records in some way. [01:29:03] Speaker B: Yeah. If, if, if, if everything is, if everything is information and information is available, then of course something like that would exist. Because if everything's happening at once, it's already happened. So the information is there to access. I feel like it's just being able to find the right people that are doing it correctly and that aren't doing it just to feed a fantasy to validate the mind, which is what happens with a lot of the psychics. It's very surface level. It's to make you feel good and it's, it's validating the fantasy that you want to believe that you are it's validating the primary part of the mind, not the secondary. [01:29:43] Speaker A: I see. Yeah, I mean, I would say it's easier also. How much time do you have, by the way? I don't want to, like, hold you up. [01:29:52] Speaker B: No, you're good. [01:29:52] Speaker A: You're free. Chilling. Okay. So my point is, I would say it's easier. How do I phrase this? Let me rephrase this. Is it even possible if everything is just information encoded that we can tap into? You know, there is this Akashic records in some way. Can we tap into the future? Because I don't. Personally, I don't think so. I don't think there is a future. I think I can see the past. Why? We can tap into the past, like certain kind of imprints information that has already been encoded. But the future, that's a whole other animal. Because it's like, what is the future like? We haven't. We haven't created it yet. It's not like the past has already been created. So it makes sense that you can tap into the past, right, in terms of emotional imprints, mental imprints, whatever. However you want to explain it, it's there and done. But the future. Can you time travel into the future, you think? [01:30:47] Speaker B: That's a great question. So I'll tell you how I see the future. When people are asking me. So what I usually do is I read in three different states. I will read the reality of what's currently happening, what needs to happen for them to get to their goal of what they're asking me for, for, and then the practical steps of how to do that. When I'm looking at what needs to happen, then I may look at the timeline for that. So I get this visual of me and the person standing at a road, but the road splits, and what I see is their choices. And then what I see is at the end of the road, what their choice gives them. So I think this is what looking into the future is. So if someone says, raya, what happens when I do what you tell me to? And I get what will happen if I do that? So I'll look down that timeline. I'll say, this is what will happen if you do that? Then I'll also look at another road. I'll look at how their mind's going to sabotage it and go, this is what's going to happen if you don't care for the mind, part of the mind that's going to sabotage you. [01:31:56] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:31:56] Speaker B: So that's how I'm viewing time and the way that I Work as a psychic is I collect evidence so the client will come back to me in a year and go, oh, you were right. It's like, yeah, that thing that you said that was going to happen happened because I didn't do that thing that you told me to do. Yes. So it's do. It's to do with possibilities, I feel. So you can shift your timeline or your future, but it's. It's difficult. And this brings back circles back to being a magician. We are aiming for true sovereignty and presence so that we can dictate what's happening currently and obviously influence the future as well. But we're influencing the future through intention and energy. And as long as we're. It's coming from a space that's grounded and not from the shadow, the. We will manifest the future in which we desire. But if it's. If you're manifesting it and you're not acknowledging the shadow, you will amplify the dysfunction from where you're manifesting. So you may get the thing that you want. An example of this is I was like, I'm going to buy a tiny house. It'll be amazing. I'll live in the forest by myself and be a wizard, because that was my goal. So I did a bunch of magic. And yes, I got that. I got the house, the tiny home in the forest so I could be a spiritual wizard. I was an idiot. What I didn't realize is I was manifesting that from a space of my trauma. And I manifested my trauma in a. In a way that's really hilarious, because I was born premature and I had to be in a box for a really long time. Hence why I'm so psychic, because I had to read everything because no one was touching me or talking to me. [01:33:49] Speaker A: Oh, wow. [01:33:49] Speaker B: Right. So that's why. One of the reasons why then I manifested that very thing because I hadn't dealt with the trauma of being a premie baby, almost dying, all the stuff that came with that. And I was manifesting from a space of wanting to be safe because I was afraid. So the safest thing I knew was a box. So I ended up manifesting this box that I lived in that was horrific. And it just manifested all of my trauma around it. So I don't know if that all makes sense, but what I'm saying is, because I hadn't acknowledged that part of myself that felt very unsafe, I was manifesting from fear. I created the very thing that I didn't want, but I got the thing that I asked For. [01:34:32] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. So it's like we always get what we want, not necessarily how we want it. [01:34:38] Speaker B: Yes. And it will always amplify the dysfunction. So when we're looking at timelines, when I'm reading people's future, I'll be like, yeah, you can get that thing, but this is what's going to happen. And that's why I always go to the feeling, what's the feeling you want to feel? Not what's the thing that you want, because you get the thing, but you're not going to feel the way that you think you're going to feel getting it. [01:35:00] Speaker A: Yeah. Oof. That's deep. Yep. This is good stuff. [01:35:06] Speaker B: I'm glad. [01:35:08] Speaker A: Yeah. It's like I've always known this. Like, I've always known this stuff, but I never really. I never really had a conversation actually, with anybody to this level about how. How this works. You know, it's almost like, scientific in a way. [01:35:24] Speaker B: Yes, it is scientific. In the end, it's all just feeling your feelings. It's really simple. But we love complicating things and we love making the mind more dominant in the way we exist. And I feel like what's happening with humanity right now is it's. Especially with AI. You know how people are freaking out about AI, Right, yeah. The main people that are freaking out about AI are coming from the space of intellectuality. They've relied on their mind as a form of survival. So if AI comes in, it's taking over that intellectuality or that practical way of existing. They haven't acknowledged their emotional intuitive self, so it gets very threatened. Whereas I'm like, oh, yeah, cool. All right. So they'll take care of practical stuff, but I'm an intuitive being and I'm an emotional being. So that's. That's what I. As a psychic, I'm good. I'm like, yep, I'm good. I don't mind. But I can see how it would threaten people's livelihoods. And it's challenging with artists because I love art and all those things that are happening, but I really feel the people that feel most threatened by it are those who are living in the intellectual. [01:36:32] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. I mean, you can extend that out to the world in general. Like, how do I put this? If you're living all mind, all intellectual, anything that happens in the world, you'll feel threatened. It only makes sense. That's the only basis of. Like, that's your foundation of reality. Like, that's your foundation of everything. But when you go a little Bit deeper into yourself. I think it lays the foundation of safety that we kind of spoke on a little bit, that no matter what happens on the outside world, there is this like. Yeah, it's a kind of a quantum, a state that watches everything that comes and goes because you realize that you have the power. So no matter what happens from the outside, you can transmutate it. Kind of like Neo in the Matrix, you know, that's what I picture. [01:37:27] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [01:37:28] Speaker A: What comes up. Right. You're kind of bobbing and weaving. [01:37:32] Speaker B: Yep. I think that's a really good mindset to come from too, with what you're saying. And I feel like I want to say to the audience, anyone who's still watching this, you need to collect evidence around it. I'm not just making airy fairy claims. This is stuff that I've embodied and learned and teach other people. [01:37:51] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:37:52] Speaker B: So it's. You need to collect evidence. Otherwise, you know, the mind's very. It's going to dismiss it very easily. [01:37:59] Speaker A: Yep. 100. Yeah. And it's evidence too. Right. Would you say that is experiential? So it's not necessarily like mathematical proofs. It's evidence that is. You actually have to go through it. Right. The evidence has to be done by doing the work. Like it has to be. Yeah, I guess. Experiential, embodied. Is that what you're going to say? [01:38:20] Speaker B: So, yeah, definitely. It has to be. I mean, from someone that's. I mean, I might be a bit biased because I'm not intellectual. I mean, I am to a capacity, but I rely heavily on feeling and doing, physically doing things. So for me to embody the knowledge and wisdom that I have is because I've felt it. And this is the big disconnect that we have with society. People say, I know. Right, I know. But what's actually happening is you've learned it in the mind, you've intellectualized it and then you've dismissed it as you've already had that experience. And this is prolific in the spiritual community. There's a lot of. I know already, I've done that. But what hasn't happened is it hasn't been felt because there's a knowing and then there's a feeling that needs to be acknowledged. So saying that you've done shadow work is different to embodying the experience of shadow work because when you go into that part of yourself, it's fucked up. It's terrifying. You're feeling anything that's been suppressed that you haven't acknowledged you're seeing Parts of yourself that you want to dismiss, deny, or not accept. And then you have to see your karma that you've created and how you too have done shit things to other people. And that's what I think karma is, that this is what the real embodiment. This is what real embodiment means. I think that's. That's what I know so far. Who knows? It could change next week. [01:39:54] Speaker A: No, I feel that. Yeah, it's. It's tough. It's definitely tough. But it's worth it. It's worth it to do that. [01:40:01] Speaker B: What do you feel is the thing that you've embodied the most? What have you embodied? [01:40:08] Speaker A: Embodied the most. [01:40:11] Speaker B: What have you had a most. The most felt sense. Like you've felt it and you just know because you felt it. [01:40:19] Speaker A: I don't. I mean, I don't know. I feel like I don't really know what you're getting at. I feel like that's like a very broad question, like a very vague question. Question. I mean that in the nicest way. Like, would you be able to give me example for you and maybe I'll understand that a little more totally. [01:40:34] Speaker B: Okay. [01:40:34] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:40:35] Speaker B: All right. So what I would say is so personal. I never really understood what it was like to be terrified until I actually experienced the terror that I had suppressed, depressed. So when I'm working with people in a similar situation, I'll speak into that when they're going through it, and I'll say, you will. This will happen. This will eventually come up. And this is not being me being a therapist. This is me being a psychic. And they're usually working with a therapist. But if they're going through deep shadow work, they have to be working with a therapist, someone that can hold space for them. But I'll give them a warning of, you're going to hit a moment where you feel your terror and it will be the most amount of fear you've ever felt. And it will completely take over you because that's what's been suppressed and you're creating safety for it to come up. And because I've been through that experience, I know what the steps are that are going to happen. So with my students, if it's their journey to experience that, I can give them a guidebook on what's on going, going to happen. But I didn't really understand what feeling terror was or feeling repressed emotions was until I actually went through it myself. So I've had a really. And that's why I'm so careful with people as well, when they come in to see me, I won't tell them everything I see because sometimes it's too much for their nervous system. [01:42:09] Speaker A: I see. Well, thank you for sharing that. Maybe I can say what I've really had to sit through is loss, the fear of loss. And really in really coming into the understanding. And I think it's still a work in progress, honestly. But I've had moments, opening moments of opening, emotional opening, we could say, of losing everything that I. I hold dear, right? And really sitting with that, it's like, yeah, I'm gonna have to let all this go one day. The people I love, the things that I love, the things that I like to do myself, the things of myself that I like. Right? Really sitting with that, that's a tough one. And like I said, I still think I'm working on that. But the fear of loss, or, like, just loss in general, just sitting with losing it. All right? It's really not even necessarily like, death, like my own death, but like others, I'm gonna have to lose others. Like, I love people so much. And the fact that I'm gonna have to, like, lose some of my friends someday, my parents, my dog, that's tough. So I've sat with that a few times, and that's a tough one to work through. But it helps sitting with it, right? Like, it helps actually sitting with it, because you come out the other side a better person. So, you know, all that deep shit that we all got in in our minds like that, like, the fear of loss, I think we all have that or stuff to that degree that the dark stuff in there, it helps to just sit with it and recognize it, because I'm almost like, okay. I don't know if I'm okay with it, but I'm a little more okay with losing the things that I find dear now. You know? [01:43:49] Speaker B: Oh, that's. You know, what's really interesting about that answer is it feeds into you wanting freedom. Because when you spoke. When you spoke about your definition of what your thought freedom is to you, what freedom is. And it was. I can't remember word for word, but something like just being able to have nothing and be present. So what you've gone through, you felt that intense grief and despair and loss. You've really embodied what that feeling is. And then you're like, okay, I never want to feel like that again. Or I want to be okay with that feeling when it comes. Because you've embodied that experience. So that is actually where you're a part of why you Want to feel free is because you're trying. You don't. Don't want to feel that loss. You want to be comfortable. [01:44:41] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:44:41] Speaker B: In that space again. [01:44:43] Speaker A: Yeah, that's good. Yeah. Comfortable with loss because it's, like, not necessarily running away from loss. It's like being comfortable when it comes. [01:44:54] Speaker B: Yeah. Or having a. Like, what does your mind want? Like, your mind's wanting some sort of safety around it which speaks into. Perhaps there's still some grief within the loss that you've experienced, or there's still some vulnerability that's lingering. Lingling. Lingling. [01:45:12] Speaker A: Lingering lingo. Like that. [01:45:15] Speaker B: Lingling there that you're. But you're still acknowledging. And, like, I'm still working through stuff too. There's still stuff that's always coming up. I'm still. Oh, I'm still upset about that. Okay, so there's some connection there for you with loss being okay with nothing and then feeling free in it. [01:45:34] Speaker A: Yeah, that's good. [01:45:39] Speaker B: Which makes me think, like, the layer underneath that is there's a sense of being controlled by being attached to those things. [01:45:50] Speaker A: Yeah. Oh, that's okay. You're hitting. You're hitting some parts in me on this one that are. They're striking a chord, that's for sure. Ah, I don't know. Yeah. I wouldn't be able to really describe what you just said, but it definitely is true. I think it has to do with that control, too. Yeah. Because I have this, like, idea of I want to control. I think that has to do with. That's the dark side of the freedom that I want is, like, control. I want to be able to control my life, you know, I don't want to be at the whim of anything else or anybody else. So, yeah, the. The fear of losing control, I think that's in there, too. [01:46:32] Speaker B: That's a really common one. Yep. [01:46:34] Speaker A: Yeah. Right. That's got to be for, like, everybody in some way. [01:46:38] Speaker B: So what I was. [01:46:39] Speaker A: Control. [01:46:40] Speaker B: Yeah. And the mind wants to be in control of not feeling. So what I would say to you is there's something about loss that makes you feel out of control as well. [01:46:51] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:46:52] Speaker B: There's another layer there. [01:46:54] Speaker A: God, you're good, Raya. [01:46:55] Speaker B: That's what I do. I read people's minds. So I see the layers of people all the time. [01:47:01] Speaker A: Yeah, I can tell you're legit. This is. This is why I do this stuff, is because, like, if I wasn't going on this adventure of talking to people all over the world, I wouldn't be able to elucidate this to myself, you know, like, having this kind of conversation to me is. It's. It's so. What's the word I'm looking for? It's so, like, it just helps me grow, I guess. You know, like, doing this is just very, very productive. I don't. I couldn't think of another word. Like, this is, like, literally helping me. Right. I know I said maybe in the beginning, like, I do this for. As a means to, you know, get paid in some way, as validation in some way. The connect, make connections, social networking. But really, this is. This is helping me. Like doing this stuff with people that are very in tune with themselves. It's an honor to be able to do this stuff. And I mean that. It's an honor to be able to sit down and examine. Examine each other in this moment. So. Yeah. Appreciate you. Appreciate you coming on here and showing me this stuff. It's like, I've always known, too. Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you. All this stuff. I knew. All this stuff. It's like, it's. It's been in there. I think it's like your skill seems to be. I mean, I don't really know you that well, but. But from the last two hours, it's like your skill is like, unveiling things. Like, it's almost like psychic tree. Is that the word? Psychic? Psychic. [01:48:37] Speaker B: I like it. Let's go with it. [01:48:39] Speaker A: Yeah. It's almost like psychic tree is showing parts they couldn't see themselves. It's like you just kind of like helping somebody along, providing hints. Right. That are always in there. But it's hard for one to see on their own accord. [01:48:55] Speaker B: Yes, 100%. Because the mind doesn't want you to see yourself. [01:49:01] Speaker A: Yeah. That's what I see as your skill. You just kind of throw out these threads. Right. You kind of plant seeds in some way. You offer, like, ideas. And you probably can recognize that they're not always right. Right. They're not always correct. But you have like, a good gauge of. You probably had a really good success rate of being able to see these things in people. Like to understand and offer insight. It's really. I think that's the word is insight into other people's minds. So they can see it themselves. [01:49:37] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, in a. Absolutely. And our conversation is just from me knowing what I know. So when I'm going into a reading, it's a little bit different because I'm getting full permission from the person to explore their subconscious. And then as I'm in their Mind. I'm telling them about their mind, confirming it with them. But it's something that I've always been very fascinated with, because knowing other people kept me safe, which is why I'm very good at this, because I needed to know. [01:50:10] Speaker A: Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, I get that. Wow, that's good. Yeah. So knowing. Maybe that's why. [01:50:18] Speaker B: Yes. [01:50:18] Speaker A: How do I put this? Like, maybe that's why, Because I. I see a trend, obviously, that women are more psychic than men, or at least they outwardly. Like, there's a lot more psychic women. The man is a lot more witches than wizards, we could say. Right. Way more, actually. And maybe it's because, like, women have to. To feel safe. It's like a safety mechanism that women have to like to feel safe in the tribe in some way. You know, it's almost like in their DNA, it's almost like in your loins to be safe. And that safety is what paves the way towards psychic tree. That might be a new word that I invented. [01:50:59] Speaker B: Psych. [01:51:00] Speaker A: But you know what I'm getting out here. [01:51:01] Speaker B: Yeah. I feel like you're really onto something. If you're going back to, like, primalistic situations, like tribes. It was always with the woman that was the. The seer or the intuitive one or the emotional one. Because intuition, at its core is emotion. That's what it. It's all it is. It's just emotion. And then men, their role was to be the protector and the provider. So they're like the brute force. And then the woman are like, okay, I feel like if you go over there, that's what. Where you'll find food for us to eat. Right. From that perspective, simplifying it. But if you're looking at it, if you're bringing it into the modern realm still, as women, we aren't physically able to protect ourselves. Yeah, exactly. [01:51:51] Speaker A: That's what I'm getting at. [01:51:52] Speaker B: Yes. Yeah. So totally. Having intuition around relationships and people is definitely there. But the missing piece is being able to ground the intuition into this reality. Because if you're afraid and you're viewing through fear, inevitably you're going to see that information with the fear intact into it. And this is why the separation of the mind is so incredibly important. Because I need to acknowledge my mind and my emotional state so it doesn't impact or influence my intuition in any way. I don't want to go into advice or what I know. I just want to be in an intuitive state. So I can't be viewing people through fear. Which is another reason why Being a high level psychic is so taxing because you have to be in a very grounded state to read someone, otherwise all your bullshit is going to come in and tightened. Tainted. [01:52:54] Speaker A: Yeah, this makes a lot of sense to me. [01:53:00] Speaker B: Okay, that's good. [01:53:03] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:53:03] Speaker B: Well, it's been really lovely chatting with you and I love talking about this stuff. It's not. I don't get the opportunity to talk about this stuff very often. So it is my work. So I really appreciate you seeing the value in that and inviting me on for a conversation. You're obviously doing some great stuff as well. And I'm noticing like you're the people you're interviewing and your channel's getting bigger and you're getting more curious, so feels like you're on the right path, I think so. [01:53:34] Speaker A: We're getting there. But yeah, it's only possible because people like you say yes. So eternal gratitude for you coming on here, being vulnerable to me. Yes. [01:53:45] Speaker B: Yeah, very vulnerable. [01:53:48] Speaker A: Yeah, it was cool. I mean, I feel like you did read a little bit. Like it wasn't like a formal reading, but you're definitely working some magic. I felt it. [01:53:56] Speaker B: I feel like what I've learned as a psychic is that everything's patterns, so emotions become information. That is a pattern. So by you telling me things, it reminds me of patterns that I see in people's minds, which makes. Which makes obvious sense. So I view and see, see patterns as they're playing out. When I'm in someone's mind, it's more accurate, but just from general information that you're telling me, I'm like, oh, well, usually when I see that this is what that means. [01:54:29] Speaker A: I get you. Yeah. [01:54:31] Speaker B: We're very predictable. We're not. They're not as complex and individualized is what we think. We're all the same. [01:54:40] Speaker A: We're all the same. Really. We're all the same at a deep level. Yep. Well. Hey, Rhea. This was awesome. Kind of speechless, but I'll thank you again. [01:54:53] Speaker B: Thank you. [01:54:54] Speaker A: Good work. [01:54:55] Speaker B: You too. [01:54:55] Speaker A: Seriously. [01:54:56] Speaker B: I enjoyed that. [01:54:57] Speaker A: Do you have anything else you want to say, though, before we wrap this up? [01:55:01] Speaker B: I guess I should do a shameless promotion. [01:55:03] Speaker A: Go for it. [01:55:04] Speaker B: Promote myself a little bit. [01:55:06] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:55:06] Speaker B: My marketing comes in, people can find me, obviously through my YouTube channel, which I'm sure you'll link me in. [01:55:13] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. [01:55:14] Speaker B: And then they can go to my website. So what I specialize in is helping people see their emotional blockages and how to move towards their purpose. But I'm also a teacher and a mentor and I take on students every six months, I take on students in a group platform. If you're interested in developing your intuition and understanding how your mind works. That's what I specialize in. [01:55:37] Speaker A: Awesome. Well, I think we should tap in again sometime in the future. [01:55:42] Speaker B: Yeah, that'd be great. When you're big and famous and you're like, you've got a whole studio decked out, and you're, like, interviewing the most spiritual people in the world. [01:55:52] Speaker A: Yeah. You'll be one of them. Maybe it'll be in person, you know, like actually in studio. That'd be something. [01:55:58] Speaker B: Yeah. Maybe we can talk about time travel, too. A bit more deeper. Go into time travel. Get some science. [01:56:03] Speaker A: Right. A whole thing on time travel. We shall see. We shall see what the future holds. But until then, I wish you all the best. For you keep up the awesome work and. Yeah. Thank you again. [01:56:15] Speaker B: Thank you. [01:56:17] Speaker A: Peace and love. [01:56:18] Speaker B: See you later. [01:56:18] Speaker A: Peace and love, everybody.